Post with 2 notes
A bit too much
So this week I am struggling. I am struggling with tiredness, I am struggling with visitors and I am struggling with the list of things I think I need to get done. I am giving myself such a hard time trying to do it all and I have forgotten that I have a 5 week old and I really should just be soaking her up and only seeing to her needs.
I have sat with so many friends and sisters while they have cried over exactly the same things and told them to take some pressure off and learn to say no. To leave the housework to order groceries online and what do I do when it is my turn??? I fall into the same hole. Why do we do this to ourselves??
Poor little Sadie was so over being out and about yesterday, you could actually see her relax when we got home. I am trying to keep friends happy, family happy and run a household and I really should just be doing one thing, making sure Sadie is happy and content.
So today we stay home, we have to go out tomorrow as Sadie has a doctors appointment but after the current lot of visitors leave we are locking ourselves away in this apartment and letting her sleep in her bed not her pram.
Final little vent, why do people tell me that the baby should work around you, that they can sleep anywhere and that I should relax about the fact that Singapore is hopeless at ensuring there are nursing rooms available for breastfeeding. Then in the next breath they will tell you that when they had babies they never went anywhere and if they did it was to visit parents!
So this weekend I am saying no, Sadie is going into the baby carrier on her Dad’s chest and he is her protector. Fortunately I don’t even need to tell him to do this, he is amazing at it already!
Post with 3 notes
Life as a new Mum in Singapore
If you had asked me a year ago what I would be doing in this time next year I would never have guessed it would be living in Singapore and looking after a one month old.
A year ago we were actually in Singapore as I was running a workshop, Adam came along and we had a ball with more than a bit of drinking and relaxing going on. We had just had our third miscarriage and had started our testing, I was just getting my head around looking forward without children.
But here we are, 8 and a half months into living here with our gorgeous and long awaited daughter, living in SINGAPORE! How did that happen??
When I pictured myself as a new mum I saw myself living in Seddon (Melbourne), seeing my sister and nephews daily and getting around the neighborhood with all my local friends cooing over my baby. Well that did not happen but plenty of cooing happens in Singapore.
Babies (like everywhere) are very much celebrated here, as a pregnant woman I definitely had my share of attention but my goodness Sadie is constantly looked at and complimented here. Everywhere we go she is a conversation starter with locals and expats alike. Of course the fact that I was out and about within a week of her being born was a novelty as the local woman all have a months confinement before they go out.
There are plenty of challenges to being here, but I researched to death these obstacles and tried to put as many things in place to make it easier for us when bub was born.
It is the small things like not having a car and getting around by taxi, getting my head around that was huge. How was I going to get myself and the baby in quickly, efficiently (as you hold up a whole line of people) as well as safely as I could.
Coming from Australia where there are laws on child seats and car safety it went against everything I know to be in a taxi with the capsule only secured by a seat belt! But if you want to get out and about you just have to.
The pram - was another big one, the footpaths (or lack of) can be so tricky, not to mention so many stairs! I really had to research a pram that I could attach a capsule too, was light (as I am not so big) and was easy to maneuver around. The Mountain Buggy is the best! It is nice and high,so easy for me to collapse and get into the boot of a taxi and as it is slim I can get around “most” supermarket aisles.
The heat - Sadie seems to cope pretty well with the heat, if anything it soothes her to sleep but then again we are not in it for too long. But the air conditioning is not nice on the poor little love, we rug her up in a full outfit when inside of long sleeves, pants and socks and a singlet as well. She is just a little dot and you feel awful when you see her mouth start chattering!
A social network - I met the nicest group of women at my pregnancy classes, they are all expats who are having their first child and we just clicked. We have couples from Australia, England, Germany and France and they are a fantastic support. We are all going through the same thing having our first baby away from family and friends so it is great to have each other. We actually all just celebrated our first mothers day together and I loved it!
Expats just help each other, you are so open to any offers of help or social gathering, so much more than if you were at home. We rely on these networks to get by and I appreciate it so much. I have a lovely group now that I can reach out to and have a coffee with or lunch, or even just email each other with new things that we have found.
Singapore of course is so well set up for expats and groups like the New Mothers group are fantastic, my girlfriend and I are joining and cannot wait to start the walks at the botanical gardens, monthly talks and coffee mornings.
I have no complaints at all from life here, the hospital was amazing, the doctors for Sadie really lovely and they even follow the Australian immunisations for her and I have taken advantage of any groups that I can join without exhausting myself and Sadie. It does not replace my family back home, but I really can say that Singapore is feeling pretty good for us right now.
Post with 4 notes
Happy Mothers Day
So this is my first mothers day with Sadie but this is not my first mothers day as such. Two years ago I had just had my first miscarriage and my heart was breaking.
Last year I had just had my third miscarriage and we had started our testing at the recurrent miscarriage clinic. We spent the day at a champagne brunch in Singapore as I was here for work. Adam and I celebrated for our babies and reminded ourselves that our lives are still so exciting and full.
This year it was disbelief and mixed emotions that I am choosing out a outfit for my gorgeous daughter. I don’t forget any of my four babies today, I miss them and wish I had celebrated this day with them but I am glad I have my Sadie.
Happy Mothers day to all Mums celebrating with or without their babies. Also to those who are experiencing a long journey to motherhood xx
I have been tagged!
Ok I have some time to do this as Sadie has decided that today is a good day! She is such a good baby!
This tag is to get to know the person behind the blog better. As with any tagging game, there are rules:
Rule 1: Post the rules.
Rule 2: Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post and then make 11 new ones.
Rule 3: Tag 11 people and link them to your post.
Rule 4: Let them know you’ve tagged them.
My questions for you:
1. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
Cliched but it would either be New York or Northern Italy. I love love love the vibe of New York and I am sure I could get a transfer if I wanted it enough. I do wonder if the love would pass though. Italy - no reason required, it is gorgeous!
2. What’s the best meal you ever ate?
I had an amazing degustation meal in Piedmont Italy, the meal was amazing, the hotel just stunning and the company fantastic.
3. If you could be a character in a TV show who would you be? Why?
hmmm I would say Olivia in Fringe, she gets to cuddle with Joshua Jackson!
4. What would your life have been like if all the dreams you had at 16 came true?
At 16 I just wanted to get away from my country town and finish high school. That came true!
5. What is your dream job?
I enjoy the job I do now, I am good at it and there is career progression. I am not sure I have a dream job, I would love to eventually run a cafe with my husband but whether we do it is a different matter.
6. If you could change one thing (and only one thing) about your body, what would it be?
Thinner arms! I think I am doing ok and then I catch sight of my arms in the mirror! They just look so chunky
7. Oprah called, she wants to know what your biggest “A-ha” moment was. What do you tell her?
When Adam and I moved to Sydney, we needed the change for our relationship. Away from family and friends we were really able to get to know each other and begin to rely on each other properly. I think it was the best thing for our relationship and has made us so much stronger. We have realised that we need family and friends but our main priority should always be each other first.
8. Why did you start your blog?
For family and friends in Australia and the US, since we moved to Singapore after telling them we were pregnant again (not knowing if it would be successful) we wanted to keep everyone up to date with how we were going and what we were up to.
9. What song would best describe your life at this very moment?
A song stuck in my head a lot at the moment as we are using it for Sadie’s video for family is Bright Eyes, First day of my life. It is all firsts at the moment.
10. What’s the most embarrassing thing you did this week?
Well I am not really getting out much, but I am not having much luck in the kitchen. I am trying to do too much and nothing is coming together. Not really that embarrassing but I hate not being in control.
11. Why aren’t we best friends?
The distance does make it difficult but your posts do make me laugh, I like friends who can do that!
My questions for you!
1. What is your favourite tv show at the moment?
2. Who were your favourite band when you were a teen?
3. What are your ultimate dinner guests?
4. Who is your favourite author?
5. If you were offered a free trip to meet your favourite blogger who would that be?
6. Whose blog do you look forward to reading the most?
7. What bad habit would you like to lose the most?
8. When and where is your next holiday?
9. What was the last movie that you watched?
10. What is one thing that most people don’t know about you?
11. How many followers do you have?
Post with 4 notes
The arrival of Sadie
I have read some really lovely birth stories on here, some people just have such a nice writing style and I have been putting on hold writing mine as I just cannot make it flow. But let me just get it all down and see how I go!
The last few weeks of my pregnancy were a bit of a struggle with my irritable uterus, we were in and out of hospital a few times as the contractions caused some pain and discomfort. My obstetrician did offer to induce me at 38 weeks but suggested we wait for a spontaneous labour as it would be a lot easier and better for baby. That was enough for me to decide that while I was uncomfortable and in a bit of pain, I would rather make sure bub arrived under the best possible circumstances.
On the day before I went into labour (Monday) I spent most of the day in bed, I was angry, emotional, tired and decided it was best I just did not talk to anyone. I was just so out of sorts and thought bed was a better option. I woke at 2am on the tuesday with some menstrual type cramping, I heated up my heat pack and got back into bed. I did not think too much of it since I had this on and off for a few weeks. At 5am I woke with lower back pain as well and I was unable to go back to sleep but was still not convinced that the pains would stay.
I told Adam to go to work as the pains were not that bad and who knew how long they would last, I guess at that point I just expected to be pregnant forever. By 9:30am they were getting stronger and I realized that they were coming in waves. I had read that to tell if it was braxton hicks or contractions try going for a walk or a shower and see if they go away. I jumped in the shower and they ramped up, I knew then that this was it.
I called Adam at 10:30am just to let him know what was happening, he asked if he should come home and I was almost going to say no stay longer when I got my first big contraction, so it was a quick “Yes, come home!”. I put some make up on (got to be photo ready!), finished packing the hospital bag with chargers, snacks and clothes for Adam and breathed through a few more contractions. Adam was home within 20 minutes and we finished packing and called a taxi.
When we arrived at midday they had a labour room ready for us and I was checked to see how far dilated I was, by then the contractions were about 4 mins apart. I was so disappointed to find out I was only 1cm! My Obstetrician came to see me and said that I would have the baby either today or tomorrow but would take a while.Luckily I had the last two parts of Harry Potter for us to watch on the laptop as well as some tv shows to catch up on!
My doctor told us he would be back in 2 hours to check my progress and we were left to our own devices to see how I dilate. I was monitored to make sure the baby was ok but eventually I could not stand being on the bed, it is just not natural!
Within a hour of arriving the pains started to get closer together and quite intense, I held Adam’s hand and concentrated on deep breathing and just rocking. Quite suddenly I felt my waters go and I knew things were speeding up. Poor Adam saw a whole other person in those two hours, I could not talk I would not lie or sit and could only lean all my weight against him and try and get through the contractions that were starting to come right on top of each other.
I really was not aware of the time or who was in or out of the room but I was scared that I was going through all this pain and I was not that far along, I was concerned that I was just not coping at all. When we knew my doctor was due to come back Adam and I decided we definitely wanted an epidural and the nurse started the paperwork. I wanted to wait and see how far along I was though as my original aim was for natural, if not then I wanted to at least be 5cms along.
When my doctor came back at about 3pm I struggled on to the bed after a big contraction and tried to calm myself down. He was so surprised to see that in that time I had gone from 1 cm to 6cm, oh thank goodness I was not totally pathetic! He agreed that an epidural was a good idea so I could rest and prepare for pushing.
I really should have called this post “God Bless the Epidural”, it was amazing! There is so much pressure to have a natural birth and not have any pain killers but we had gone in as open minded as possible and I think that was the best idea. My obstetrician asked that they do it as quick as possible as I was dilating so quickly, by the time he arrived 20 mins later I was about 8 cms. He was lovely but I was unable to answer questions and I just did as I was told, Adam was amazing and just talked me through it.
Within 10 mins it had worked its magic and I was able to breathe normally and start talking again, I did get the shakes a bit but the relief was amazing. The epidural was a lot worse in my head than the actual needle, I really was so out of it with the contractions and exhaustion that it was nothing.
We spent the next hour or so just getting our heads around the fact that this was all happening. It was amazing to see them prepare the room for the baby’s arrival and I have to say that the bed for bub at the end of mine really was such a pushing incentive.
Adam was able to finally go to the bathroom and get a snack, I had not let him out of my sight the whole time and the poor guy was so patient. I called my Mum back in Australia to let her know that I was about to start pushing, she was a bit taken back but told me she loved me and that she could not wait. I reassured her Adam would call as soon as we could.
The midwives at the hospital were fantastic and talked me through everything that they were doing, I was hooked up to an IV by this stage with antibiotics, I had a catheter, the epidural plus the heart monitors and I had no idea! The nurse checked me at about 5pm and I was fully dilated so we start to prepare for the pushing.
To cut this long story short, the pushing was harder than I thought, getting your head around the right way to push is tricky but the midwife was a huge help. My doctor arrived after about 20 mins as Sadie’s heart rate kept dropping, I remember looking up and there was four midwives, my doctor, the pediatrician and Adam all in the room.
My doctor was so nice and calm and explained to Adam and I that the bub’s heart beat was dropping so they were going to need to use the vacuum to help. At that point it really was a matter of getting him/her out safely so we told him to do what he needed to do.
So at 5:59pm, surrounded by great staff and my gorgeous husband, with the help of the vacuum and an episiotomy our baby was born. She was quickly put on my chest so I could have a kiss and we checked to see what it was, Adam was in shock that it was a girl but the tears just rolled down his face. Sadie then got some extra help from the paeditrician for a while as she was in a bit of shock.
After being weighed and measured with Dad close by she was finally put on my chest for my long dreamt of skin to skin and first feed. I think I was still in a little shock also but it was an amazing moment and I get teary just thinking of it.
Calls were made to all our family in Australia and the US and the celebrations began!
Photo with 1 note
A little time on the playmat, she did well to last 10 mins before getting cranky and deciding a feed was in order
Post with 1 note
Proud Mama
Today Sadie is 1 week old and I feel like we have had her for so much longer, we are both just so in love with her. Yes she is unsettled a bit at night and it is me that feeds and soothes as Adam is back at work, but I just am so content!
We just got back from her first doctors check up and he was so great, reassured us she is looking good and the yellow jaundice look is going, checked over the few things we had noted and said she was gaining weight well! She was 3 kilos at birth and was down to 2.8kilos when we left the hospital last thursday. Today she weighed in at 3.08 kilos so we are up 208grams, I was so relieved! It was like I passed a test.
This is one proud mama who is also about to treat herself to a snooze on the couch!
Link reblogged from Via Ukraine with 61 notes
Via Ukraine: Don't Ignore: Infertility is a Disease →
I really don’t need to add to this, but with my daughter now one week old I have to say that any tears I have had are purely in disbelief that she is here, we really do have a daughter. The struggle and journey was hard and exhausting but she is worth the wait!
This year Resolve’s campaign against infertility is called “Don’t Ignore”. It’s purpose is to draw attention to how infertility affects every aspect of a person’s life. Everything. Your marriage, your body, your emotions, your friendships, your work. You get the idea.
I am a pretty private…
Source: viaukraine
Photo with 4 notes
Sadie Kathleen born Tuesday 17 April at 5:59pm. Weight 6.6 pounds, 50 cms in length. She was born in a hurry but is such a calm and gorgeous baby! More details to come soon and the birth story only if anyone is interested.
Page 1 of 7
